memories....

as the year comes to a close
i try to recall the good and the bad of the year that just flew by
its hard for me to sort through everything that has happen
somethings bring heartache
somethings bring a smile

it seems we always say
i hope next year is better
and then something else happens
which brings me to accept that every year is going to have ups and downs
every year is going to be good and bad
it is how we live
day by day

i do have to be thankful for many things
and most of those things are my family
and my friends
without each one of them, the days would be hard to get through

i am thankful
and whatever 2014 has for me
bring it
i am ready

whatever you do, make a splash
m

i want you to live forever

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=33snM578oKA

Such an inspiration to me!!!

This little cupcake has spent most of her life in the hospital battling cancer
she took her first steps in the hospital

she has had 8 surgeries
14 rounds of chemo
and she still continues to smile

Lilly and her parents were living between the Los Angeles Childrens Hospital and the Ronald McDonald House
They lost everything to fight for their LILLY!!! Their jobs, home, belongings, pets....everything
Today this little cupcake is cancer free

she went for an MRI on Friday and are waiting for the results now
there was a mass close to her heart, and they are waiting for the results to see what this mass is

HOPE
we are all hoping its nothing........

a good case of the BLAHSSSSS

so today is one of those days
not really sure what is going on
i havent been feeling well for a the last week, and now i am just blah
i dont think this weather is helping much either
its rainy, cold
misty, foggy and warm
the weather here in Louisiana can NOT make up its mind
yuck...pretty....yuck...pretty
thats normal here
we should be use to it
but....doesnt mean i have to like it

i need to get out and get my shopping done

Christmas will be here before we know it

Karma, she is a bitch

but oh how sweet it is
=)

I just love a good karma "gotcha" moment

and this is why I don't try to hard to get back at people
instead I forgive
and let it go
it makes me feel better
and eventually that person will pay
might be months, might be years, but they will pay
i promise

i have seen it

so forgive
it brings peace
to your soul

The rusted signs, left just for me

Tidal waves don’t beg forgiveness
'CRASHED' and on their way
Father he enjoyed collisions; others walked away
A snowflake falls in may

And the doors are open now as the bells are ringing out
Nature has its own religion; gospel of the land
Father ruled by long division, young men they pretend
Old men comprehend

And the 'CLOUDS BREAK' at dawn; shedding light upon this town
They’ll all come ‘round

And the road 
The old man paved
The broken seams along the way
The rusted signs, left just for me
He was guiding me, love, his own way
Now the man of the hour is taking his final bow
As the curtain comes down 
I feel that this is just goodbye for now

my father
in his own way
has shown me so much
how to love, how to let go and how to be happy
others might disagree
but I am well aware of his ways
and what he intended to teach me
I resisted in a lot of ways
but as I grow, I know, exactly what he was trying to say

I love you daddy,
Mich

come back

If I keep holding out
will the light shine through?
Under this broken roof
it's only rain that I feel
I've been waiting out the days
Come Back.

I have been planning out
All that I'd say to you
Since you slipped away
Know that I still remain true
I've been wishing out the days

Please say, that if you hadn't of gone now
I wouldn't have lost you another way
From wherever you are
Come Back.

And these days, they linger on
And I'm the night, as I'm waiting on
The real possibility I may meet you in my dream
I go to sleep

If I don't fall apart
will the memories stay clear
So you had to go
and I had to remain here



But the strangest thing to date
So far away
And yet you feel so close
And I'm not gonna question it any other way

There must be an open door
For you to
Come Back

And the days, they linger on
And every night, what I'm waiting for
Is the real possibility I may meet you in my dream

And sometimes you're there
And you're talking back to me
Come the morning I could swear you're next to me

And it's okay.I'll be here
Come Back

......and i fall apart

You look at me
You speak my name
I'm counting down
You are to blame

He falls together
But I fall apart
I fall apart

Where are you going?
Who are you seeing?
When are you coming back?

and sometimes........i fall apart

she built her wings

life is always full of surprises
some good
some bad
some sad
and some just hurt you to your core

i had no idea words could hurt so badly
but they do
i have never had someone i cared so much about say such hurtful things
maybe i deserved it
honestly if the person was really my friend and cared about me
i think if it was really something i deserved
it could have been said in a nicer way
i am good with constructive criticism

we all have our weaknesses
we all make mistakes
we are all looking for attention
we all want to feel wanted
we all want to feel loved
we all want to feel needed
that doesnt make me a freak
that makes me human

i am not perfect
i never wanted to be
i am prefectly imperfect
and i am proud to be that

i have had disagreements with people


she built her wings~~~on the way down

sticks and stones.....

will break bones
and words will hurt
they hurt more deeply than people realize

what is going on with Amanda Bynes???
the poor little girl is obviously desperate for attention of some kind
she seems to be posting odd pictures from her twitter
and now someone has started "bynesing"
which is being compared to planking but with a shirt over your head
why?
she isnt the only one who ever put a shirt over her head
or a blanket
or a bag
or a mask!!!














i dont understand society anymore
why do we pick on people like this
look what happen to Britney Spears
how do people sleep at night knowing they might have played a part in some of these celebrities actually going crazy
the paparazzi that surrounds every celebrity, even those that arent even REAL celebrities
they will cause you to lose your mind
i have seen them completely invade peoples privacy
and yes i know
they knew what they were getting into
but honestly, does that make it alright?
i think not

this poor girl started out acting as a child
she will join that long list of child actors who will struggle for the rest of their lives
and not only does she have the photographers and media following her every move
but she also has the common person mocking her and making fun

next we will probably see her beating some photographer with an umbrella
or shaving her head

*shakes head*

sometimes the people in this world really disappoint me
with all the "stop bullying"
and yet grown ass adults are bullying in their own little way
HYPOCRITES!!!

i was taught not to make fun of anyone when i was little
and i taught my children to same
my two boys took up for defenseless school mates that were made fun of
i know, cause i got called to school because of it
and they would come home and tell me how they felt bad for a certain child

i just wish there were more people in this world who didnt thrive on exposing the worst in others

love leaves a memory no one can steal

my heart is very heavy today
a very special friend of mine has lost his sister to cancer
this young lady had fought so hard
and was very positive with a smile at all times
until closer to her last days, she was overwhelmed with pain
and was just ready for it to end

my heart hurts for her family and her children
these children are so confused, bitter and sad
cancer is a horrible disease
and it doesnt discriminate
it affects everyone

so today
i am thankful for the ones i do have in my life
and the ones who truly care about me
its moments like this that make me realize just how lucky i am

so hug the ones that are special to you
and if they arent nearby, at least let them know you care

(hugs)

pink cowboy boots

I can remember when i was young
i always wished for a little girl
one that i could play dolls with
and dress up
and we could go shopping and get our nails done

dont get me wrong
i love my two boys
with all of my heart
i am sure there is a reason i didnt have a girl

but my sister had one
and i immediately adopted her
what a hard headed little girl she was too
i would always try to brush her hair and fix it nice
and she would get so mad
and tell me to stop

she had gorgeous long curly hair
and she would never let me do anything to it
it always looked like a mop
she was always sort of a hard, tom boy, strong willed little girl
she had an older brother that constantly picked on her
and she learned early how to protect herself
and fight back
to this day, i swear she can kick his ass

but she was the only girl on our side of the family
and my oh my was she spoiled!!
i would go visit my sister often

i remember it like it was yesterday
i would go over there and try to help her out
or just hang out with her
and everytime i knocked on the door, my niece would intercept me at the door
drag me to her room
and lock the door
she would tell me Aunt Chele you are playing with me not my mommy
i want you to stay in here with me
ok?
how could i say NO??? =/
so i did
i stayed in there for a long long time
playing, watching cartoons, coloring
whatever she wanted to do
she usually came home with me
and spent the night
her and my youngest son were like brother and sister
they use to play school all the time
so cute

i still remember, and so does she, the pink pair of cowboy boots i bought her when she was about 8 years old
she wore them everywhere
for her golden birthday, she turned 9 on the 9th of December
i took her to see her favorite Disney Movie
LIVE at the Saenger Theater
i will never forget picking her up that night
she had the cutest little dress on and those pink boots
her feet were starting to get too big
but her mom said she insisted she wear them
she was so excited
so was i
i love live theater and i wanted her to witness it too

we talked and laughed the whole way
we were so excited
we found our seats
and waited
we didnt talk again except during intermission
we were both on the edge of our seats
and unable to stop staring at the stage
it was amazing
at that moment
i was 9 also

there are many moments i remember with my sisters children and my own
and this is one of them
one i will never forget
and i dont think she will either

i love her unconditionally, as i do my two nephews and my two boys
they might mess up
but i will never stop loving them

i think i might buy her a new pair of pink boots for her birthday this year
just because
<3 nbsp="" p="">

cry cry baby

I am listening to one of my favorite artist

Janis Joplin
I was raised listening to Me and Bobby McGee
my all time favorite song of hers is Piece of my Heart
i totally get into that song
its an emotional one, and gets to me every time

so today is Janis Joplin day =)
i still cry every time i watch the Rose
she was such a lonely soul
all she wanted was someone to love her











Janis Joplin is one of the 27 club members
such tragedy that these artist die so young
over 40 of them
among the list are Jimi Hendrix, Kurt Cobain, Amy Winehouse, and Jim Morrison

music always makes me feel better
and yes

YOU NEED MORE MUSIC!!!

peace,
m

quiet on the set

ah yes
seems lately our little city has been popular with filming
whether it be movies, series, or a documentary
there is always someone filming somewhere around here
almost daily

we must be cheap =-) (giggle)

anyways, some time ago
we had someone come here and shot for a series 
they did street scenes
it was quite interesting
to watch a car go down the street on a trailer
while a camera is filming
quite funny actually

but today they are shooting inside
and around the grounds here at work
why?
cause we have extremely old and historic buildings here
and this show is a detective show
i think its about a detective searching for a serial killer
and its many years later

they are shooting right now, next door at an old high school that has been vacant for about 30 years
Matthew McConaughey, who won my heart in The Wedding Planner, is the main actor in this series

Titled:

Untitled Detective Project

 Two detectives, Rust Cohle and Martin Hart, lives become entangled during a 17-year hunt for a serial killer in Louisiana.

I will keep watching
Security is out there
and i am quite sure that when he comes, we will know

i am glad they took some of the boards off the windows
the smell of mold and cat urine is overwhelming in there
but there is so much history in there
including an auditorium that could be gorgeous
the wood work is amazing
the city has applied for a grant to restore this school that most of our city had attended at one time

not too long ago the SyFy channel was here filming a movie called "ghost shark"
they filmed for a day in our building

i am pleased that so many people are coming here to film
its not just in the big city of New Orleans anymore, its in the little surrounding places
like my little city!!!

This is inside the high school
there are many pictures with little dots
yes
i believe they are aura's
i cant help but think its children
or maybe even the teachers












how can this place NOT BE HAUNTED!!!!?????

Go Saints!

Ah yes
The draft is happening
We got some good. Got rid of some good ....which I hate!!! They traded one of my favorite players Ivory :(
But......lets hope they know what they are doing

So are ya ready for some football????

Cause I am!!
I need this. It's my distraction !!!
I can't wait to go to the first home game. We are going to be so loud the roof is going to come off the dome.

My sons GF is such a doll. She is the daughter I never had. Her and I get along so well. Her mom got this cheerleader doll for me. She has blond hair and brown eyes just like me and she has lucky green stones in her ears and on her ribbons. She is so cute!!!

Hopefully with this cute little cheerleaders help we will have a good season this year.

Who dat baby!!!

if love was enough

i'd wrap it around you.........

he stopped loving her today

RIP George Jones

I believe

I Believe... 

That you can do something in an instant
That will give you heartache for life

Best sister award

So according to my sister
I get this award

:)

I have not stopped
She bought a new house
Which needed lots of cosmetic surgery
Painting
Cleaning
Tender loving care

And that's what I have been doing for a week now
I have not stopped
My thighs will be in shape
Squatting
And painting
Cleaning

I have been over there every night till midnight or 1am
Non stop

Not that I don't enjoy spending time with her
We giggle about the stupidest things

Recently we have been focusing on a video we found on tosh.o
Oh my god
It's a stripper that shoots water out of her butt
I know right ??
What the.......????
First off
How does one come upon this thought of actually putting water inside of you and shooting it out?!?
Oh wait....I have a good idea....the guys will love it .......
Um no.....they got up and ran

Can you imagine when they go home
"Honey, you smell like sh*t"
"Oh yes dear, I was at the strip club again "
*Rolls eyes*

I guess it's better than glitter
NOT!!!!!

So she brought me flowers and has been buying me lunch/dinner/ ice cream and a new wallet. I could get use to this.

I love my sis
And honestly I can't imagine not helping her get settled in her new home

By the way
The moon is bright tonight

full moon

ah yes
its that time of year
the FULL MOON

of course it is
thats why everything has been so whack
thats why all the crazy people are calling my office
and thats why i feel so BLAH!!!

its the FULL MOON!!!
dam it

phone call:
lady: "there is a fire in Kenner, where is it?"
me: "um, i have no idea, didnt even know there was a fire"
lady: "well......(silence)...."
me: "you can call the fire department"
lady:  "oh, ok, thank you"
me:  "you are welcome"
hang up

really?
are people THAT crazy!?!
why yes, Michele......yes they are

kinda like yes, Virginia there is a Santa Claus
Yes, Michele there are crazy people in this world

*gasp*

no way



as much as i love the full moon
the way it lights up the night
especially out in the country
where there are no street lights
no porch lights
lay down in the grass, look up, watch the stars
just me and the moon
lovely <3 br="" nbsp="">

i see the moon
and the moon sees me

but the crazy people DO tend to come out

so watch out
hide your children and pets

keep your eyes open

i saw a change in you

why do i always try to change myself
if someone likes me for me
why am i always wanting to try to change?

i might seem like someone who is confident
and believes in herself
but when it really comes down to it
i am very scared and unsure
my self esteem is low, and i have no confidence in myself at all
i might smile and look like i know what i am doing
but i really dont

yes i am broken
yes i am damaged
yes i know you cant fix me
only i can fix me

yes, there comes a time.....

There comes a time in your life, when you walk away from all the drama and people who create it.

You surround yourself with people who make you laugh.

Forget the bad, and focus on the good.

Love the people who treat you right, pray for the ones who don't.

Life is too short to be anything but happy.

Falling down is a part of life, getting back up is living.

~Life goes on...never end it.

Recent events

I can't help but believe the recent events in Boston have affected me in some ways

These acts are sometimes over done on social media and the news and people do tend to get carried away

But I also believe that the victims and their loved ones have to know that people out there care

We can't just sit back and be silent
I for one am one of those that share my feelings in twitter and Facebook.
If I feel strong enough about something
You are going to read about it
I hope that the out poor of genuine concern and care have reached these victims and their families
They are not forgotten

I don't know who did this and why
And it is not for me to try and find out
And I can't even begin to wrap my brain around this

If its a conspiracy thing like everybody says, then that completely freaks me out
If its a terrorist attack, them that completely pisses me off
If its a mentally ill person, that makes me extremely sad

These kind of events affect me more than I had even imagined. Watching this unfold reminded me of 9/11 all over again
I was completely heartbroken
How
Why
All the questions
The innocent people

It's so hard to digest
I wanna know what is happening
But sometimes it's just too hard to continue to watch it

I just hope that whoever did this horrific act will pay at some point

I hope that karma comes back
Seems she always does

Easter Time

This has always been my most favorite time of the year
spring time
flowers
freshness
hunting for easter eggs
just a clean start, everything new

its always been a time of year my family gets together
and we dye easter eggs
and we have a big easter egg hunt
even now, with the kids being adults, i still make them dye easter eggs
and they like it
actually they love it
the girlfriends have gotten excited about it now
their families never did anything like this
what?
and i thought my family was dysfunctional
and yet we seem way above normal

its the traditions
those stick with the kids
through the years
they have stuck with me
and it seems odd when we dont stick with them

i miss these days tho
the days when i was young
and had no worries
my sister and i, always having to put on our new easter dress
always had the shoes, hat and new purse to match!

every year until we were teenagers
then we started doing the same thing to our own kids

the smell of the blooming flowers
the freshness of rain
the butterflies
all reminds me of spring and the wonderful memories we had

memories
cherish them

you are never too old.....

.........to not need your daddy

Today I got some really upsetting news
some news that I never really thought about getting till I was old enough to realize
that my parents weren't going to be around ALL OF MY LIFE

And just recently I started realizing that they are getting older
and they cant do everything like they use to
trust me they can both still keep up with me going out drinking
and having a good time
my mom and dad can out dance and drink people who are in their 20's
they are full of life
and love having fun

they are my best friends
We go everywhere together
vacation, store, dinner, out, dancing

So...today was not a good day

as i was sitting in the park i watched a young man
and his little girl playing in the park
it reminded me of my daddy and i
and i started thinking back on all the fun
all the motorcycle riding, the camping trips
the vacations, holidays just sitting around being goofy


i found out today my daddy has Cancer
i know in today's time there are ways to treat
and people beat it everyday
but when your mom calls you
crying uncontrollably
and tells me dad has the C word!!!

and my heart is breaking now
my daddy
i love my daddy
(written 10-31-12)

broken wings

Thank you for being 
Such a friend to me; 
Oh, I pray a friend for life.
And have I ever told you 
How much you mean to me?
Oh, you're everything to me
I'm thinking all the time, 
How to tell you what I feel, 
I'm contemplating phrases... 
I'm gazing at eternity; 
I am floating in serenity... 

And I am so lost for words.
And I am so overwhelmed.

Please don't go just yet.
Can we stay a moment please?
We can dance together; 
We can dance forever.

Under your stars tonight, 
And I am so overwhelmed.

So close your eyes, 
But don't dream too deep.
And please pass me some memories.
And when I fall you're underneath
A thousand broken hearts, 
Carried by a thousand broken wings.

A thousand broken wings.

Gone far too soon

(written 11-9-11)

as i sit here and listen my sister cry in the corner of the office

i wonder why these young souls are trying to so desperately to numb their bodies

to take drugs, drink and do whatever they can to make things go away

why are they so very troubled today?

and then i think

we are all troubled

we just deal with it differently

each one of us

my son and nephew will be burying one of their very best friends tomorrow

what a sad day this will be

a mother has to bury her own child, only 23 years old

my heart is breaking for all of them, their friends and his parents

i guess we all deal with that feeling of no self-worth differently

we all deal with the feeling of nobody wanting us differently

the feeling that we arent good enough

the wanting to fit in.....and just be happy

or maybe just getting through ONE MORE DAY

i want so badly to say this is so selfish of him

he knew he was doing the wrong thing

and yet he still did it

and took that chance

and now, his family and friends have a huge hole in their heart

a hole where he was

an empty feeling

everyone is second guessing their own actions

wondering if there was something else they might have been able to do

when actually, they all did everything they could possibly do

they were always there for him, they told him what he was doing wasnt good

and he knew that this would someday happen

and yet he still chose this road

he was one of the kindest, sweetest and funniest friends of theirs

he always, always had a smile on his face

he use to greet my son with " hey there lighthouse"

because my son is so tall....and my son would just SMILE

he had that way about him

he made YOU smile

i would like to believe that GOD has a plan for him

it somehow comforts me to think that maybe he took him out of THIS life

to stop him from having anymore pain

and before he did something worse

but i don't know

why couldn't HE just help him a little more

to kick this

to get better........

my son and nephew need him HERE......

my nephew is taking it the hardest

he hasn't stopped crying since Sunday morning

and he is the one i most worried about

he is sensitive and this was his BEST friend

he also relys on substances to make him feel numb

and this is when i worry

although my sister and i can not watch him constantly

we can be there to talk to him

but i am so afraid of the days ahead

i am just not sure what is going to happen to him

he is falling apart daily, and tomorrow is going to be tragic

today i read an article about teens soaking tampons in vodka,

and inserting them to get HIGH

its not only the girls, the guys too

really kids?

why is it so important to be loaded....numb?!?!

this is life

you are SUPPOSE TO FEEL

that's what makes it LIFE.......

everyday its something new these kids are trying

and everyday another dies

our youth today need help

and in a bad way

i have preached and preached to my children

they know

they are 18 and 23 now, all i can do is be there to answer any questions

my 18 year old talks to me about EVERYTHING

and i am so grateful

this world has lost another young soul

one that was good and loving

what is becoming of our youth!?!?!

Better than Ezra

Such an amazing night
So many people
So much fun

I want to see them again
There is tonight's show :)

Thank god I have my BTE

hanging by a moment

I'm desperate for changing

Starving for truth

I'm closer to where I started

I'm chasing after you

I'm falling even more in love with you

Letting go of all I've held onto

I'm standing here until you make me move

I'm hanging by a moment here with you

Forgetting all I'm lacking

Completely incomplete

I'll take your invitation

You take all of me now

I'm living for the only thing I know

I'm running and not quite sure where to go

And I don't know what I'm diving into

Just hanging by a moment here with you

There's nothing else to lose

There's nothing else to find

There's nothing in the world

That can change my mind

Just hanging by a moment

Hanging by a moment here with you

.......................................................

~chelie

i never knew

I never knew that someone could be such a flat out LIAR!!!!

just one day

This puzzle piece has been lost 

i touch the place

I find the map and draw a straight line
Over rivers, farms, and state lines
The distance from 'A' to where you'd be
It's only finger-lengths that I see
I touch the place where I'd find your face
My finger in creases of distant dark places

I hang my coat up in the first bar
There is no peace that I've found so far
The laughter penetrates my silence
As drunken men find flaws in science

Their words mostly noises
Ghosts with just voices
Your words in my memory
Are like music to me

After I have travelled so far
We'd set the fire to the third bar
We'd share each other like an island
Until exhausted, close our eyelids
And dreaming, pick up from
The last place we left off
Your soft skin is weeping
A joy you can't keep in

I'm miles from where you are,
I lay down on the cold ground
And I, I pray that something picks me up
and sets me down in your warm arms

......
its amazing how two people can be so far away from each other
and yet so close

something comes over me
and i smile,
m